A Letter For My Mom 🎈🎁

So today is my mom’s birthday! And of course I’m sending her a gift, but I also wanted to write something to tell my mom how much I love her. Except it was a little hard, because we haven’t always had the best relationship. So, I googled “famous songs about moms”. It took me one song to know what to write.

Here’s why I love my mom:

  • She’s beautiful. Her smile and laugh have always been two of my favorite things in the entire world. My mother lights up every room she walks into and I love her for it. My mom sparkles. 

  • She’s literally one of the strongest people I know. I remember when I was around 12 my aunt stopped paying the mortgage (for months) and one day stopped taking my mom’s rent money because she was telling us to move out. Abruptly. Because foreclosure. My mom freaked for a bit, but then she bought the house. My early 30’s single mom turned a shitty situation into home ownership. And then she turned it into investment property. Like a boss.

  • My mom really is a boss. Literally. My mom employs half of my family. My mom is the reason I know my grandma is okay while I’m all the way in Alaska. My mom is the reason I can afford to send my grandma new purses while I’m all the way in Alaska. My mom is setting an example for my little sisters and all the other little black girls in my community. My mom is showing Newark Black Female Entrepreneurship every day. My mom is changing the world. 

  • My mom has a really nice touch. We stopped hugging as I got older, but sometimes I break down and let her hug me and I swear I can melt in her arms. My mom fills me with warmth, especially when I need her the most. 

  • My mom is pretty fucking selfless. She doesn’t give me everything I want, but she definitely gives a lot to a lot of people. Apparently my mom is kind of a pushover, who knew! I love that I’ve lived with my mom my entire life and other people can still show me things about her that I love. 

  • I just really fucking like her. The more I get to know my mom, the more I really really like her. The more I respect her. The more I admire her. The more I’m proud of her. She’s kind of cool. 

I am proud to say that I feel like I could go on forever, but I think we get the point. I love my mom. And as I’m sitting in Alaska with the privilege to start an online fashion brand and prepare to move to a new city, I can’t help but thank her too. 

Thank you mom for everything you have ever done for me. Thank you for allowing me to wreck your car on my joyride to Delaware and live to brag about it. Thank you for tucking me in and kissing my forehead my first night home from LA. Thank you for being my net and making sure I never fall too far. Thank you for teaching me travel is life. Thank you for always coming back when I push you away. (Thank you for breast feeding and pumping for me when I was a baby). Thank you for being the strong, boss of an empire that you are. And thank you for never being afraid to leave a man you knew wasn’t your soulmate. Thank you for being the absolute best example of a woman. I love you. 

Happy Birthday! 

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Frustrated? Don’t Lock Your Roomie In The Bathroom 😉

I threw a temper tantrum yesterday. It was small and semi-concealed and involved me talking to 2 supervisors, HR, and eventually my district manager (sister of a family friend) for a day off. I got ½ a day. Instead of 10 hours Sunday, I work 4. 🙃

At first I thought I was being a spoiled brat, and was super hard on myself; but then I realized I’m exhausted because I’m frustrated and I do a lot.

I have a YouTube, a blog, I’m launching a small business, and on top of that I’m now working 45 hours/wk at a job I don’t love. Don’t get me wrong, I love my life. But now I kind of feel overwhelmed. Extremely overwhelmed. And I kind of hate my roommate. Two thumbs up! 👍🏽👍🏼

I knew Alaska would test me, and I knew I would grow here, but for some reason I thought all the experiences would be fun. And when I realized it wasn’t all fun and games, I threw a mini temper tantrum, like a big girl.

I need to find a way to be happy in all the turmoil. I need to find something that rejuvenates me without needing 12 hours of sleep, because I just don’t have that kind of time anymore.

Do I run? Do I do yoga? Hiking is annoying because I don’t want to get eaten by a moose or a bear. (Or a lynx lol #AlaskaProblems). 🐻

What can I do for me that makes me want to wake up in the morning and not lock my roommate in the bathroom? What will give me enough energy to not need 3 cups of coffee per day?

I guess that’s this week’s goal…

I need to figure out what I can do for me that will make me happy in the midst of a torrential downpour and a lack of sleep. Yes, I’m dramatic, and I know this is just a really annoying and inconvenient storm that will pass in 3 months or less; so how can I get through this as my happiest, healthiest self?

Any ideas?? Let me know in the comments please 💛💛.

From Poor to Upper Middle Class 💅🏼

I woke up in Alaska today! 30 hours of travel was absolutely BRUTAL (and I still need a nap) but I freaking woke up in Alaska today!

My room is unpacked, I have a dresser and a closet I share with my 70+ year old roommate, and I get to live in Alaska for the next 3 months! ❤️

I am so excited to see who I’ll be when I leave; and I am so excited to live every experience that helps me become that person. I got a tattoo on Saturday that says “Brilliant,” and that just means I get to live a brilliant life. Plus, I do believe that I am pretty brilliant too. Lol!

So, I am in Alaska for 3 months with a stable job and housing. I am traveling the world and living my dreams. I had a six hour layover in Seattle and it felt like I was visiting home because I lived there for a month. And now I live in Alaska. 💛

Yesterday I realized I need a passion to pursue (not necessarily a baby), and today I realized I am upper middle class (my mom told me). I have everything I have ever wanted in my life right now and I’m so happy and so content I don’t quite know what to do with myself.

Also, I don’t want Jake anymore. I was home in NJ for a few weeks and I saw so many plumbers and HVAC trucks driven by disgusting old men with big bellies and dirty hair and I realized: I left him. On purpose. I did not want him for my life and when I look at where I am now vs. who I would have been with him, I fucking made the right choice. I left him on purpose and I meant it. ❤️❤️

I don’t know what else to write, but I really wanted to check in. It’s my first real day in Alaska and I’m excited to see where we go from here.

“Not all those who wander are lost” – or maybe I am, but in the very best way! 🥰😜💋

Want Success? Plant A Seed Every Day 🌵

This week, I figured out something that’s kind of important: Do ONE thing at a time. I have so much to do, that I get overwhelmed and end up doing nothing; and yesterday, I stuck to one thing all day and got it done.

To be more specific, yesterday I completed ❤️ my casting application for The Bachelor. Of course I was still stressed and overwhelmed about not creating the new store; and today that’s what I woke up stressed about. But know what I’m not stressed about? My Bachelor application. 😁 That envelope is sealed, signed, dated, and ready to go. It just needs a stamp.

Plant a seed every day.

Don’t just look at the seed. Don’t just plan how to have an illustrious garden. Don’t just wonder about your garden full of tomatoes, cucumbers, lemons, limes, and whatever else you want. Plant the tomatoes. Then plant the cucumbers. Then the lemons, then the limes. Then you have a garden.

It’s 9:40 AM on a Wednesday and all I have to do today is build a website and create ads. That’s it! I have all day and I’m home alone with nothing else to do. I get to plant another seed today. 🤗

Tomorrow morning when my store is up, what will I be stressed about? That’s a story for another day. 🦋

Here’s your to-do list:

  1. Write out everything you want. Not things you “need to do”, but things you actually want for your life. I want to be on The Bachelor and run an online clothing store. Then I want babies, and a kick ass nonprofit for women.
  2. Assign each thing on your list to a specific day. I don’t have a job or kids, so I have plenty of time. Do you only have weekends? Every Sunday you accomplish a task. Deal?
  3. Only add things to your list that can be accomplished in a day. “Start a Nonprofit” is not on my list. “Do market research and schedule interviews with female entrepreneurs” is.
  4. See that list get shorter every week. That’s the beauty of getting sh*t done. Once it’s done, it’s freaking done!
  5. Revel in how happy your life looks when your seeds start to blossom. You did it! Step by step, day by day.

Plant your seeds baby girl! See your dreams come to fruition. 🌷

Song of the Day: Work B*tch x Britney Spears

I Don’t Want A Job, I Want A Baby 🧸

Just talked to my mom and she dropped that little “B” word again: burden.

I do not want a job. In fact, I have NEVER wanted a job. I have literally quit every job I’ve ever had and just last week I turned down a $55k marketing position in Los Angeles to be unemployed in New Jersey. My mom thinks I should apply to Target. Know what I want? A rich husband and babies.

I get it, for other women that might not be a reality. For my mother, that is probably not a reality. But me? A tall, lean, well spoken, 26 year old Ivy League graduate who looks like a model and now lives 30 minutes outside Manhattan? This could 100% be my reality.

Fun Fact: I used to love the show Imposters (I still do, just haven’t seen any new episodes) and I do think I could get a guy to propose in 2-3 months. I truly believe I can. In fact, that actually sounds like a FUN challenge! It even sounds like something I can vlog and put on my YouTube channel. 🌞

And if it doesn’t work, I get a divorce. But if it does work, I’ll have everything I ever wanted (literally) and I can move on to finding the next great thing that makes me really happy, with a family I adore in tow. #winning!

Maybe once I have a family, I’ll actually want a career. Maybe once my heart is taken care of, I can focus on pleasing society. Because right now I don’t want a career in the slightest, I just want a husband. Then a baby. And since I graduated I’ve been so unfocused. I keep saying I need a tangible goal. A gorgeous ring (attached to a great guy) IS a tangible goal. 😊❤️

Grown ass women don’t ask permission.

I will always hustle so that there’s cash in my bank account and I will never depend on a man if I don’t want to. My mother asked, “well what if you meet someone you’re compatible with who’s not rich?” Well then baby girl, we are not compatible. I am one of the most go-getting b*tches you will ever meet; my husband needs to be the same.

I am not a gold digger, I just know what I want. And I have always wanted a family more than I wanted a job. That doesn’t make me not a feminist, or not strong, or not an independent woman. It makes me ME.

I will always be unhappy if I keep chasing things other people want. Other people can have ALL the office jobs, I don’t want it. I literally don’t.

I want YouTube and my blog and a beautiful life to film. I want to run a nonprofit that helps women start businesses. I want a platform where I can freely speak my mind. And the best part? We live in a society where that lifestyle PAYS. My dream of having a rich husband and cute babies could be the exact thing that launches my career and puts me on Forbes 30 Under 30 List. Or makes me a New York Times Best Selling Author. Or both! Those are my dreams. Society can keep everything else.

Also, I’m actively applying to law school at the moment (taking the LSAT in September! 😁) and I do realize I could meet my husband there, Elle Woods style. So maybe I won’t get married right away. Maybe it’s ok to just admit that I want it. ❤️

🌸 Watch my Bachelor Audition ⤵️

Song of the Day: You Belong x Rachel Platten

We (Millennials) Think We’re Poor, But We’re Really Not 🤯

Have you seen the recent season of Shameless where Frank competes with homeless people and a black sorority girl for the title of “The Hobo Loco Man”? No? Well you’re missing out!

In this (epic) season of one of my favorite shows in the entire world, some savvy digital marketers realize young people love to be poor. We love to be homeless! Maybe it’s the thrill of it? So how else do you get us to buy beer: Have homeless-adjacent people fight to the death to sell it to us? YES!

All jokes aside, this season brought a few questions to my mind:

1) Am I really homeless?

2) Did I really choose to live out of my car and a suitcase?
And…..

3) What separates me from the meth addict sleeping in a tent on Skid Row?⛺️

And I don’t mean to be insensitive, but seriously, what is the difference? If you know me, you may know I have lots of homeless friends. And I love Chipotle. And I love to buy Chipotle and beer for certain citizens of Los Angeles; and sit on their tarps; while we eat said Chipotle and beer and blast music on Sunset Blvd. People stare. That’s just me. But whenever I do hang out with homeless people, I am clearly not one of them. When I was literally homeless, I was still not one of them.

A friend read my Failing Out Loud blog post and mentioned that homeless people were not there by choice, and maybe my post was doing a disservice to their reality. Maybe it was a little insensitive.

I got evicted. Well technically, I got served with the court notice that my landlord wanted my apartment because I hadn’t paid rent in three months, and instead of fighting it, I just left. I put my entire apartment in storage and I embarked on a season long road trip across the West Coast. Because my depression told me it was safer to travel the world than be a homeless hermit in an apartment I was no longer entitled to. 🚘

I am not taking away from the actual homeless problem in California (and the US in general), but how many of our choices are really our own? How many of us are making irrational decisions every day based on mental illnesses, or fear (or depression), or perceptions of reality that don’t actually exist? TBH we’re all a little crazy.

Also, there are many homeless people who choose to be homeless. They don’t like society and they choose to live on the fringes of it. They choose freedom to be their weird ass selves. I get that.

I have the ability to work and earn enough for housing.

I guess that is the difference. I have blessings that make homelessness not scary. I have a family I can run to if things ever got too hard. I have an Ivy League degree that basically acts as a Get-A-Job-Free Credit Card whenever I choose to use it. I have friends with couches and mentors with spare bedrooms. I have a car. I have a roof when it rains. I have Instagram, and a blog, and a platform to share my stories so I don’t feel so alone. I shop at Goodwill to resell the clothes, not to wear them.

I grew up poor, and I always thought I stayed poor, but now I have this privilege that separates me from the actual people in need and that is so important to realize. I’m not looking down on anyone, in fact I tried really hard to become homeless myself, but appreciating my experience means realizing it for what it is: I am not homeless. I am loved and cared for and protected.

No matter how shitty you think your life is, look for the blessings. Literally, look at the next homeless person you see (buy them dinner) and then make a list of all the ways you are so freaking fortunate. You couldn’t blend in with them if you tried. What a fucking blessing.

Song of the Day: Girl On Fire x Alicia Keys

Welcome to Seattle! Failing Out Loud 🚣

So I’ve been homeless for 3 months. I’ve lived in at least 6 cities, tripled the names in my contact list, and traded my MacBook Air for an iPad with a keyboard because iPads have data and travel is life. My Verizon phone bill is Unlimited Everything and $150 a month. And I can’t tell you the last time I paid rent. Or held a job longer than two weeks.

Before this, I can’t tell you the last time I really liked myself. Or was proud of my accomplishments. I can’t tell you the last time I looked at my life and smiled.

Now, I get giddy. Literally. I’m fucking excited for my life. And sometimes waking up is hard, because being homeless is extremely exhausting, but starting a new adventure every day is also exhilarating.

Confused?

I have been hiding my failures since I moved to LA three years ago and that’s been stupid. If you knew me then, you would think I’m a huge failure now; a lot of people do. I ruined my credit, have no savings, and I’m not even in Seattle anymore because I didn’t love it. Literally. I looked around and asked myself, “do i love this?” and when I realized the answer was “no” I moved on to the next place.

When I left LA in February, I think @JeanineAmapola had just announced another Big Surprise! for her followers and I remember thinking, “do they ever fail?” Influencers. Do they ever fail. People think I’m an influencer and I’m convinced I’m not because I fail all the time. And when I fail I’m scared to tell people/show people and let the world judge me, so then I don’t take pictures or film videos or make content either.

And then I fail at being an influencer because I’m not making any content so see, I’m not an influencer. I created my own failure.

I’m moving back to Los Angeles, full time. After traveling for 3 months, I realized I left because I felt inadequate. Everyone was hustling and I couldn’t get out of bed. Girls were spending small fortunes on House of CB and all I wanted to do was smoke weed at the beach. I didn’t fit in so I thought I wasn’t good enough. I was scared of failing so I left. I failed on purpose so LA couldn’t do it for me. I quit.

Does Jeanine fail? Does she ever have a great big idea that she thinks will change the world and then it just doesn’t? Does she ever go to the gym and treadmill for 30 mins just to go to Panda Express after because food makes her happy? Memorial Day is coming up, will Jeanine choose a one-piece because she feels inadequate? Does she ever feel inadequate??

I assume the answer is yes, to at least some of these questions. Because you can’t have progress without failure. If Jeanine, or any other influencer, never posted shitty videos she probably wouldn’t have learned to make good ones. If Jeanine didn’t share her stories with the internet, she probably wouldn’t even have subscribers to announce her Grand Surprises! to.

We fail because we’re scared to try, not because we’re not good enough. What if we stopped feeling ashamed when we failed and we just started embracing it?

What if your story includes your failures and that’s why you feel empty every time you try to hide them? Stop feeling ashamed or guilty when you fuck up. You will fuck up. Tell someone. Screw it, write a blog and tell everyone, “ I FAILED, but boy did I try! Or maybe I didn’t try, but that’s a learning experience too!”

If we don’t say our failures out loud we can’t celebrate them. I’ve been homeless for three months (FAIL) but I’ve traveled more in this time than I have in my entire life (SUCCESS). I’ve met so many guys I think I’m actually ready to start dating again. And now I even know what I’m looking for!

I’ve had so many people cook me dinner I could probably eat anything at this point. Personal favorite? Boxed Mac and Cheese “casserole” with canned chicken mixed in and topped with melted cheese, courtesy of my friends in Mt. Shasta, CA. I ate every bite. I’ve sat in so many homes. ❤️

Fail out loud and let the world see. I wish I had documented my trip, because now I can’t even show you guys how awesome it was. I don’t have vlogs with all the incredible people I met along the way. I didn’t Instagram the Mac and Cheese. Or the nice grown man about 30 who’d probably never seen a pretty (black) woman before and literally insisted on giving me all his candy. I took some. It was adorable.

I can’t share those moments with you guys because I actively hid them and that sucks. And I don’t even have those memories documented for myself, which sucks a little more.

Fearing failure steals your happiness. Don’t do it. Embrace the sunshine. Fail Out Loud. 🌞

Song of the Day: This is Me x Demi Lovato 🦋

Hannah B + Handmaid’s Tale = The New Alabama #ROLLTIDE 🎓

I don’t know about you, but I’m the kinda girl who watches The Bachelorette, The Real Housewives of Beverly Hills, and CNN for drama. With that being said, something caught my eye this week: Sweet Bachelorette Hannah B from Sexist Sassy Alabama… I wonder if she knows? #ROLLTIDE

This article started out as all the reasons I LOVE Hannah B, which I will list here: 

  1. She was the “crazy one” on Colton’s season of The Bachelor and that is #relatableAF. Cassie was normal and boring and I really wasn’t here for it; Cassie’s sister was on the show for 30 seconds and I even liked her better. 😂
  2. Hannah is NOT rehearsed. As someone equally quirky, and equally underestimated, I love seeing a smart woman who smiles, laughs, and is confused just as much as I am. Also, I once had a dude call me an airhead. I’m an Ivy League graduate; Hannah B graduated manga cum laude. Quirky isn’t stupid.
  3. Hannah B talks back! As gracious and charming as she is, this girl does not stand for bullshit. During the Colton season finale, I fell in love with her when Luke P tried to tell Hannah how to pin the first rose and she corrected him and pinned it her way. Some women would have acquiesced and let him do it wrong, not Hannah B!
  4. “I had sex and Jesus still loves me”. Well it’s good to know Jesus forgives, but what about Alabama State? 🤔 #ROLLTIDE
  5. She genuinely seems sweet AF. I would be friends at Hannah B. We would stroll the mall princess waving at all the wanna-be Miss America’s while laughing at all the boys who wish they could be our men. Then we would take our beautiful butts downtown and donate to the local homeless shelter, because that’s what actually matters. We also don’t use straws at Starbucks. #savetheturtles 🐢

The moral of this story is that women are smart, beautiful, capable, and AWESOME and men who try and control our bodies just turned a very sweet article into a very sour conversation. 

We smile, and we laugh; we flirt and we make conversation; and you might think we’re airheads, but I promise we are not. You (government of Alabama) CANNOT force women to have children we aren’t ready for. And apparently Alabama’s new bill-to-be-law excuses health complications, but NOT rape or incest. 

Meaning, if Hannah B got RAPED walking down the street, and her rape resulted in a pregnancy, and her doctor was in Tuscaloosa, Alabama, it would be ILLEGAL for her to abort her rapists baby, period. She would literally be FORCED to birth (and raise?) her rapists child, or die trying. This is literal people, these are Alabama’s literal laws. 

Not personal enough? Here’s a scenario: 

There could be an instance where YOU are walking home from Trader Joe’s, YOUR HUSBAND is at work or something, and a random creepy man grabs you, pulls you into an alley, and does God only knows what with YOUR body. See Thelma and Louise bar scene.

Now, not only do you have to explain to your husband that you were violated by another man, but you also have to feel the shame associated with being sexually assaulted, and THEN you have to ask your husband if he’s ok with raising this man’s baby because according to Alabama you would be required BY LAW to birth it. 

Do you get a divorce? Does your boyfriend want to raise another man’s baby? Are your other children ok with mommy giving away their rapist-seed-brother after she’s been visibly pregnant for nine months? Have you seen Jo Wilson in the latest Grey’s Anatomy?? Are you ok with your first child being a curse instead of a blessing? 

(Hannah, woman who’s currently courting 30 men, how would you feel if this were you?? What would you do?)

No access to safe and legal abortions means more young/teen moms OR more young women who die trying to keep control of their bodies.

Hannah has been given a tremendous platform and I truly hope she uses it for good and uses her voice to protect the women in her state and all the other young women who look up to her. Politics are not in a bubble seperate from us and a Bachelorette that proudly yells #ROLLTIDE should also be aware of the policies affecting her and all future University of Alabama Bachelorettes.

As a 24 year old woman who is now making six figures from her role as Bachelorette, I would also assume Hannah B wants to keep her job and her income. And of course, her life. 

And now I feel it’s also time to point out that The Bachelorette has NEVER been a woman who is also a mom. Mom= no Bachelorette hopes. You could be a Bachelor contestant… but those women don’t make salaries and the mom never wins. You don’t want to be Colton’s Elyse. I want my husband to also be the father of my children. (No offense, Elyse)

On a personal note, I would never live in Alabama because I’m still not a fan of the Confederate flag, but I do realize how policies directly affect our everyday lives, and once one state legally violates the constitution AND Roe v. Wade, none of us are safe.

Again, I don’t live in Alabama so I’m not affected right now, but but there are plenty of women who do live there and I’m sure they would like to feel safe and respected as well. Also, Hulu’s Handmaid’s Tale is trending because of this issue and I highly suggest you binge every season to catch up on the atrocities. Also, it’s a great show.

Here’s what YOU should do:

Decide how YOU feel about abortion issues and why. If you got raped tomorrow and found out you were pregnant, what options would you want? Do you want to raise a rapist’s baby? Will you have to reallocate the money you’ve been saving for a condo for a new college fund? Are you even finished paying your own student loans? Are you ok trading DryBar blowouts and fancy eyelash extensions for baby formula?

Are you ok putting your child up for adoption? Do you want the freedom to consider your options as a young woman thriving in her 20’s/ a potential new mom? Are you ok being stuck with this demon-seed- Chucky-child for the rest of your life? I’m not. No fucking way. Especially not right now. I’m twenty five.

How important is your freedom to you? How important is your career to you?  How important is your marriage? Your husband doesn’t have to birth this baby, YOU do. How do you feel about that??

A lot of us don’t plan or expect to accidentally get pregnant, but NONE of us plans or expects to get raped. Take that into consideration when you consider that a state in this beautiful country is actively working to take away your freedom to choose what happens in that exact situation

And if you live in Alabama (or don’t), contact your Governor, Kay Ivey (334.242.7100) and let her know that you like your rights, and you plan to KEEP them. #ROLLTIDE 🤙🏽

Dear Ayesha Curry 🥰

When I first saw Black Twitter tear Ayesha Curry to shreds, I laughed and laughed and laughed. I remembered Ayesha’s 2015 tweet telling other women to, “keep the good stuff covered up for the one who matters” and then I laughed again. Steph not hitting it right or something? Is he not still “the one who matters”? Sounds like Ayesha is finally getting what she deserves to me. But then I thought about it..

Here’s what I want to say to Ayesha Curry: I don’t agree with your Red Table Talk comment. I don’t see why a woman would want to be ogled by men who are not her husband. Most of us want a husband so that those other men will literally leave us alone.

Here’s what I do agree with: Ayesha’s right to say whatever she wants and to feel beautiful and wanted every single day. Mom’s get to feel beautiful. Mom’s of three get to feel beautiful. Moms who are also wives of famous well-respected NBA players get to feel beautiful. Single 25 year old writers living in Seattle get to feel beautiful. And we don’t get to shame these women for wanting to feel desired. In Ayesha’s words, “I am human.”

For those who missed it, during Ayesha’s Red Table Talk with Jada Pinkett Smith, Ayesha commented on Steph’s abundance of groupies and said, “Like the past 10 years, I don’t have any of that. I have zero- this sounds weird- but like, male attention, and so then I begin to internalize it, and I’m like, ‘Is something wrong with me?'”

Men want to feel desired, women want to feel desired; sex is literally how we procreate. It keeps the world going! But people seem to love to shame women for our sexuality and that is not ok. Donald Trump, our sitting President, literally likes to, “grab women by the pussy” and that’s apparently fine, but a gorgeous 30 year old mom of three can’t tell the world she wants to feel desired? Because her husband constantly has women throwing themselves at him all hours of the day?

As WOMEN we ALL need to stick up for Ayesha Curry and protect her right to feel beautiful and desired, and to say it out loud, because it’s our right too. I might not agree with what she said, but I agree with why she said it. Ayesha’s comment might have made me uncomfortable, but I still stand by her right to say it.

Side note: I have a Facebook friend who constantly posts online about her sexual talents. Like, I know way too much and it does make me uncomfortable, but I also know she’s freaking proud of herself and all of her capabilities. And I respect that.

For women who want to feel desired, here are my tips:

1. Make yourself feel beautiful every single day. Take a spa day, or save money and stock up on Target face masks for a spa-night. Drink a glass of wine and watch stripper dance lesson videos on YouTube. Wear high heels to work if it makes you stand taller. This works!

2. Wear lingerie for your boyfriend/husband and make sure his mouth drops to the floor when he sees you. Single? Wear lingerie for your damn self. And take pics.

3. Write out a list of all the things you love about yourself. In the case of my FB friend, I know she loves her sexual prowess. Home girl is not vanilla. What do you love about yourself?

4. Moms, take your kids out for mani-pedis so you can treat yourself too. Kids tend to be discounted. Or leave them with the babysitter and treat yourself!

5. Go out for drinks with your girls and flirt up a storm. Never give out your number, don’t go home with anyone, and use a fake name. Mine is Bianca.

Personally, I think Ayesha made her comment because Stephen is lacking in the bedroom, but that’s none of my business. Because your husband’s approval should be enough… but is it? How satisfied are you girl?? Steph Curry kisses her ass, but does he tap that ass as well? Again, none of my business.

As women we need to desire ourselves first. Because sometimes our men forget and it’s ok to want to feel desirable! We’re human.

And random men, shut the fuck up. Her body, her choice. Stop getting mad because beautiful women don’t desire you. It’s wildly hypocritical.

Oh and Ayesha, stop slut shaming women in your tweets. You can’t perpetuate a high-saddity-married-women-are-better-than-thou narrative and then be mad when it’s used against you. That’s why people don’t like you. And that logic isn’t very nice either.

Song of The Day: Can’t Hold Us Down x Christina Aguilera & Lil Kim

Why Millennials Suck! 🤖

So if you talk to people above 30, they think we’re as*holes. Why? Because we’re millennials and “millennials suck”!

Here’s a breakdown of why we “suck” so much:

We’re lazy. Social media and Postmates have created a reality where we want everything now, and we don’t want to put in any effort to get it. We don’t even have to leave our apartments to see our friends or have a fancy dinner, so why would we get up for anything else?

We’re lazy, and I like it. We’ve also mastered efficiency, which older people could benefit from.

We’re privileged and extremely entitled. As someone who didn’t come from privilege, I can proudly say my entitlement is on one hundred. I have big dreams and I plan on accomplishing them. I feel entitled to my success because I’m willing to work for it! Don’t like it? Sue me ( jk).

Side note, that incredible sense of entitlement is also why women in our generation are finally learning to negotiate their salaries and ask for raises!

We’re impatient. Referencing that digital age again, everything happens in an instant. And we’re used to it. Here’s the important lesson: learn to keep up.

While patience is important (because life isn’t digital), most of our lives are digital. There is a fine line between getting upset because your mobile order is 5 minutes late and learning how to be nice to baristas IRL. We must learn the balance, admittedly.

Now here’s why I think we’re awesome:

First and foremost, we’re making MONEY! No generation before us has ever relied on entrepreneurship and social marketing the way we do. And they never got paid the way we do either, except for like, Mark Zuckerberg.

According to Bloomberg, millionaires are getting younger and younger. With a combination of daddy’s money + self made fortunes #KyleJenner, millennials and beyond are creating our own wealth and making names for ourselves far quicker than our predecessors. See, there’s something to be said for impatience!

Here’s the story of a millennial who went from broke to millionaire in 5 years.

Next, we’re the dreamers and the game changers! We are innovative and changing the world. Literally.

We challenge dated assumptions. We don’t follow traditional career trajectories and we go out and create the companies we want to see. Some people work in offices with no windows, some people make six figures filming YouTube videos in Los Angeles.

We just elected the youngest woman ever to Congress @AlexandraOcasiaCortex #29. In fact, we elected more women into congress than ever before! We are questioning gender roles in particular. Men aren’t the only ones who work and dads taking care of their children is no longer considered babysitting. It’s now called parenting.

Not to mention, we listen to our feelings, which is important. #selflove isn’t privilege; it’s a necessity and we understand the importance of being sympathetic to ourselves and others.

We’re the best because the generations before us fucked up the world and we’re ready and willing to fix it! Technology, global warming, world’s longest government shutdown… all problems from before us. That we will fix!

We might be lazy and entitled, but those are just some of the things that make us great. Kick up your feet, order Postmates, and get ready to change the world. Right now. 😂

Song of the Day: All Star x Smash Mouth